<< back | next >>


peak:

I bought some clothes today -- a new sport coat and a couple of belts to be exact.


valley:

More weirdness with The Best Friend.


noise:

Tracy Byrd:
Put Your Hand In Mine


sustenance:

Ham sandwich.


thoughts:

SLEEP PATTERNS!
I need to develop some decent ones.


365:

June 12: Untangling cords and friendships.


tuesday, june 12th

home  |  bio  |  masthead  |  quotes  |  morgue  |  speak up  |  livejournal

   
Quote Du Jour:
"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." (E.M. Forster)


Problem identified: I must escape from my own head.

Within the confines of my cranium, I think and create for hours on end... and, then, somewhere along the way, my ideas and plans fall apart. For some reason, I have trouble executing like I want to. Part of my problem is that I am among the world's most prolific procrastinators. While this is a terrible trait to have... I think that it'll probably help me in the long run as I will end up putting off dying for a good two to three months when my time finally comes.

The other problem is that I do much of my great thinking under the cover of darkness. I'm a night owl. I love to be awake in the middle of the night when no one else is. Darkness is when I do my best scheming. However, this also involves me sleeping a great deal during the daylight hours. When I finally wake-up... its usually too late in the day to be nearly as productive as I should.... or I'm simply too tired from sleeping at such odd times. The result is that I slack my life away. I make plans by night that I don't execute during the day. As one 24-hour period comes to a close, I say, "I'll catch up tomorrow." But I don't.

I spent much of Summer 2000 repeating the above cycle. It seems that only yesterday, it was May and I was leaving school for summer. Today, it's already June 12th. It's happening again. I've started to waste away my summer. That wasn't the plan... but I guess that's the problem.


Fashion question: What is the proper attire for a church wedding on a Saturday afternoon? And, no, I don't have an invitation that might have offer some clue. I had this discussion with Jessie today. She said that afternoon hitchin's were casual. A shirt and tie would suffice. I say that I should wear a coat because men who wear shirt and ties to events should also wear coats. What do you think? Lemme know something. I need some opinions.

Well, the periodic strife is continuing between Jessie and I. We had solved our problems of a few weeks ago by simply pretending them away. We just moved on from them and, strangely enough, that seemed to work.

However, today, things turned weird again. We were riding back from an afternoon trip to Oakdale and the discussion turned to arrogance. She told me that I came across as arrogant -- that I took my confidence too far. This was a tough pill to swallow from someone that I consider to be my best friend. I thought she knew me better than that.

I am as full of shit as anybody. I know that. Obviously, some people don't think I know that. My biggest problem in this area is that I am confident. There was a time when I was but a youngin' and lacked a great deal of confidence. As I matured, I fixed that problem and I'm willing to admit that I might have overcorrected a bit. However, my dictionary defines arrogance as the showing of an offensive sense of superiority. This is definitely not me.

Unfortunately, this episode supports my ever growing theory that few people -- if any -- actually know me. Of course, I'd love to offer up a detailed explanation on the matter but I haven't a clue about this one. I simply don't understand it. This doesn't mean I won't try to figure it out. I'm just not going to try right here and right now.

I'll let you know something when I know something.

copyright © 2001-02, Thomas Fletcher. all rights reserved.