peak:
Work today was busy with runs... and they were all good calls.


valley:
Late for work.

noise:
Jimmy Durante:
"Make Someone Happy"

food:
Chicken & mashed potatoes.


thoughts:
Sleep.
Waking up.


365.25:
18 Oct. 2001
No entry.


730.50:
18 Oct. 2000
No entry.

friday
10.18.02

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Quote du jour:
"I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about." -- Henry Ford


The first thing I remember hearing this morning was the phone ringing at 7:09 a.m. -- nine minutes after I was supposed to be at work.

Somehow, I managed to sleep through alarm #1 at 5 o'clock, alarm #2 at 5:25, my cell phone alarm that had been set for 5:47 and my 800 bazillion decibel radio emergency back-up alarm at 6 a.m.

Can someone tell me how the hell that happens? Four alarms!

So now, as I prepare for bed again (it's about 11:30 p.m.), I'm worried to death that I'll do it again... I'm sort of important at my job. It's not a place where I can slip in late and go unnoticed. I don't have a newspaper gig anymore. What bugs me the most is that I'd correct whatever went wrong... but I have no idea what went wrong. Alarms were set. They apparently went off. I, however, refused to wake up.

I know that I can be stubborn, but this is a bit much.


Is it me, or has the promo music for television shows gotten a little dramatic lately. I don't even watch "Will & Grace," but who doesn't want to become emotionally involved after watching clips of an apparently epic problem played out to the tune of Faith Hill's "Cry"? Even a tune that can be upbeat -- like Pete Townsend's "Let My Love Open The Door" -- comes across with an edge in the Friends commercials.

I attribute this -- and my extensive collection of sappy love ballads in my MP3 directory -- to what I call Real World Syndrome. Music has always been important. However, have you noticed that in the last decade, folks have started to have soundtracks for their life. We have to have music for everything. If we're happy... we play the happy mix CD. If we're sad... we play REM's "Everybody Hurts" over and over. Okay... so that's only when we're really, really sad. But you get the point, eh? Those kids on Real World had music that fit every aspect of their life, so we should, too.

Then again... I don't know. It's still just a theory.

I'm worried about my cerebral health.

Lately, I'm forgetting shit left and right... and when I do remember stuff, it's sometimes the wrong stuff. It all started last week. Last Friday, I had to make a special 30-minute roundtrip to Lakeland before driving down to Oakdale because I left my camera at work, which is something I never leave behind anywhere.

Earlier this week, I was talking to dispatch on the radio and almost said "Engine 1 to Smallville." Why would I have done that? I work in Lakeland, dammit. On a related note, I refered to a couple of medics in Lakeland as employees of the ambulance company back home in Smallville. What the hell?

The most costly of my slip-ups came yesterday. I had one of our trucks out in the city to take photos of it for a project. While it was parked, a kid came up and wanted to look around. I set my camera on the front bumper and gave him a tour. And, yes, you guessed correctly. On the front bumper is where the camera remained...

Until it fell off in the middle of a busy four-lane expressway...

And broke open...

And exposed the film I'd shot during the afternoon...

Sigh.

And in the romance department... my shit is always weird.

Two years removed from a "normal" relationship with a girl that wasn't, I find myself thinking that regular dating isn't that bad of a concept. I might even like to do it again.

As I get older, the idea of fuck buddies (a concept I've always supported) is losing its luster... At least as a sole supply of intimate interaction between men and women (or between members of the same sex if that's your bag).

So, I guess what I'm saying is that I'd like to do some romancing. Yeah, that's it. Some romancing would be nice. Unfortunately, there seem to be no applicants for the position...

There is one girl that lights up the room when she walks in... But she's taken -- for now -- and saying much more would jinx it all anyway.

I feel like I'm a much more negative person as of late. That can't be good. Granted, there seem to be more than the average amount of idiots in close proximity to me recently... And my position at work gives me little power to do more than suggest change... But those aren't legitimate excuses.

Read this journal. The glass is half full. Perspective is everything. I'm not supposed to be a negative person. I'm the voice of reason. Right? Well then, what's happening to me? It's only temporary, eh?


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